Ah, yes, the frog(s) …

We have had a situation here, as they say, and thanks to Sarah’s insistence you now get the whole story. 

About a week ago, Bill got up during the night to go to the bathroom (hey, we are older than we used to be!), and when he lifted the toilet lid a fairly large frog (4-5 inches?) was looking up at him. “I don’t know who was more surprised, him or me!” Bill told me in the morning. The frog skedaddled back the way he had come, meaning down through the pipe or whatever they call it. Bill flushed a few times to help out. 

The next day, no frog. We laughed about it to one of the campus administrative assistants. But she took it very seriously. “If a frog can get in, so can other things,” she said reassuringly. She took action, calling the Most Important Person on Campus: the one in charge of water (which is another topic) and plumbing. 

That evening, there the frog was again. He’d dash back so fast we couldn’t possibly catch him, though Bill did try. He’d get back just far enough that we could see his little feet peeking out, and then – flush – he’d go away. But then, 15 minutes later, he was back. It was freaky, especially for the gender that sits to use the toilet! 

We named him Kermit and pleaded with him to go away for good. That (sleepless) night, I heard him swimming in the toilet. He was doing laps and backflips, I swear. His buddies were outside ribitting, and once I heard him croaking back, or maybe I imagined it. In the morning, hi Kermit. 

Facebook friends provided funny but not useful solutions. So, the Most Important Person came after a few more calls, and said he was so sorry about this. His solution was to dump chlorine down the toilet – even though I apparently looked sad at the idea that Kermit would die just so I could sit down. He promised to send "artisans" to look at the lines outside (where there is a giant hole with open pipes gushing into it – we can hear the sinks draining into the hole, but the toilet apparently, supposedly does not). 

Kermit was gone after the chlorine bomb. (He truly did croak this time!) So it became a story to tell.

Until a few nights ago. In the morning, Bill said, “I think I saw a frog in the toilet last night, but maybe I dreamed it.” No frog all day, and then in the evening, I picked up the lid and a smaller frog – not Kermit - zipped back down the drain. He was less noisy and persistent than Kermit, but still there – and now we were out of water. We have a big garbage can with water in it, and use that to flush the toilet when we run out, but it’s not easy.

The next morning, we called the MIP again. It was a holiday – someone (probably MIP) put cardboard over the grey water drain hole (huh?), and we waited. Last night, middle of the night, it was my turn. Up with the lid – the frog was laying all splayed out in the water. I didn’t really examine him before flushing, but I think he was one dead frog. (Please, no comments about the contents of our toilet being deadly.)

The Person came again today. He said he thought the frogs were coming in the front door (no), that they hatched in the toilet (probably not so), and that he would have the artisans come to bomb it again. And really and truly he would look at the pipes for holes, though they did before, honest! He said again how unhappy he was that this happened. 

 This post is getting long, I apologize. But one more thing. We have geckos and one day there was a little teeny one that was not healthy. He just kind of sat in the corner and occasionally moved his head. So I asked Bill, my hero, to use his little trick of putting a glass over the gecko and sliding a card under him, and then letting him go outside. Bill has used this on bees at home often. So he confidently headed in with the glass and card, and then I heard an “uh-oh” and ran in to see. He had accidentally cut off the tip of the tail of the baby gecko. We told ourselves it would grow back, but then we (Bill mainly, I couldn’t!) watched while the tip wiggled and wiggled for a long time on its own. 

In other words, our karmic debt is growing. 

Will we have more frogs? Will Important Person google it like I did (uncapped clean-out pipe, duh – is that broken cement square to the left a clean-out)? Will we have Something Else? Stay tuned.